breathe! push! breathe!

my friend jenny of "Nehnny's Bun" fame is now in labor!... and has been for quite some time.

i saw her back in october and she was HUGE then. i can only imagine she's quite the behemoth by now.

i wonder what it's like having something that big inside of you that refuses to come out.

anything i ever have inside of me wants out way too badly...and always at the worst possible times too.

hmm.


good luck jenny!

QUESTION

You're sitting in starbucks working on your script, sipping your grande peppermint moca frappacino when it hits you -- NATURE. and she wants out, fast.

you quickly pack up all your belongings, grab your coat, and race into the men's room -- one of those single toilet jobbers -- knocking an old man with diabetes outta the way in the process.

but you make it!

and they all lived happily ever after...

until you reach for some T.P. -- and the dispenser is EMPTY. not a shred left. not a scrap in sight.

your tools:

a large trashcan with a lid a few feet away (its contents unknown)

a pack of thin, flimsy, plastic toilet seat liners (mandatory in all CA public restrooms. best law EVER)

a sink four feet away

three crisp twenty dollar bills in your wallet

your voice

your cell phone

your left hand

prayer

a paper clip

two rubber bands


what oh what do you do?


...


seriously, WHAT DO YOU DO?!! i've been sitting here for three hours and the angry mob outside the door keeps getting angrier!

*blogged from my new blackberry